Prosthetically Hip

Wait a minute, /b/ was actually helpful?

February 12, 2010

For those of you who know what /b/ or 4chan is, you know that it tends to be the absolute dregs of the internet. We’re talking the depths of the Marianas Trench bad. I’d link, but if you really want to check it out on your own, you have to find it – and it won’t be hard.

Oddly enough, it’s also the birthplace of LOLcats. Go figure.

A few minutes ago, I randomly decided to pop onto /b/, as an odd way of figuring out what to do next with my day, work-wise.

Well, I was shocked to see a non scat/cp/horselove/furry/lolcat/tubgirl/2girls1cup/meme/whatever post, but this instead:

dear anon,

for many, many years there were these strange dots and filaments in my field of vision and i didn’t know what it was. i went to the oculist _several times_ but he said he couldn’t see anything unusual.
then, years after i started to live with my strange little friends (believe it or not, but i even named the first and biggest one, he’s called “horst”), i went to /b/ for a smooth little fap and then i see this picture in a “if you have floaters you must post ITT” thread.

world stood still for a second. then, i googled floaters (mouches volantes for the non-english) and found out what was accompanying me for so many years. it was so fucking relieving to just _know_ what it is, to have a term for it. it’s pretty harmless and so much fun because there isn’t a single day where i don’t play with my little friends in boring moments by letting them “jump” over obstacles and stuff. i think, my live is better with floaters, but it’s definitely better since i know what that “sickness” is.

so, anon, thank you for just sharing your diseases with other people, it might be helpful for someone! you’ll always have a place in my heart! (watch next post for tits, it’s an act of honor that i deliver)

tl;dr If you have floaters you must post ITT!

I SO have this – it’s called myodesopsia – and I’m guessing it’s quite common. I’ve had it as long as I can remember, but it’s never really negatively affected my vision, so I just ignore it most of the time. Mine is more subtle than the image below, simulating looking at a blue sky with myodesopsia:

 
I still can’t believe that /b/ was, well I wouldn’t necessarily say helpful, but I guess informative. And not in that “Oh my god, I really didn’t need to know/see that” sense.

Ramble On

February 10, 2010

The 2010 March of the St. Anthony Ramblers

Drinks and breakfast at 9, march at 10. We are again fortunate to have Panorama Brass Band tour with us throughout the day, and in order to cover the cost of these minstrels and the early morning feast, we ask for a $25 contribution – a paltry sum for such wonderful entertainment.

Hope to see you reveling in the streets tomorrow at one point or another. Below is the invite / route, and we’ll be stopping at the following bars, in order: R-Bar, Lafitte’s Blacksmith Shop, Jackson Square, Harry’s Corner, Molly’s at the Market, and the Spotted Cat.

Each year, we seem to grow, both in numbers and in fun – so if you and yours are looking for Mardi Gras Day plans, please come join us and ramble!

you guys with the illegal fireworks… who dat!

February 9, 2010

M: ya, after the game we all poured into our cars and drove home to shoot off some fire works
we didn’t want to walk the extra half-block to go into the big open field, so we decided that it would be fine to shoot them off in the neutral ground right under the power lines
P is lighting the fuse for one of the shells and I run into the street to stop the approaching car
D: oh lord
M: right as he lights it, I realize that this car I’m stopping is a cop
the cop gets on his bull horn and says “hey. hey you. you guys with the illegal fireworks… who dat!”
and drove off
I *love* this city

The New Orleans Saints Superbowl Drinking Game

February 3, 2010

Forwarded to me by Dustin, too good not to pass along:

1. Every time they mention hurricane Katrina, drink 1
2. If they show pictures of the City of New Orleans right after Katrina, drink 1
3. Every time they say how much the Saints mean to the City of New Orleans , drink 1
4. Every time the words “tragedy”, “flood”, or “devastation” are used, drink 1
5. Every time they talk about how good Reggie Bush was in college, drink 3
6. If they show Kim Kardashian in the stands, drink 5
7. Every time they show a picture of Reggie Bush with a bat or say “bringing the wood” drink for 5 seconds.
8. Every time Reggie Bush gets negative yardage trying to run around in the backfield a bunch and outrun the defense, drink 1 and turn to the person next to you and say “I told you Vince Young should have won the Heisman”
9. Every time Reggie Bush gets up and flexes his arms in that pose he likes to do, drink 1
10. If they mention Tim Tebow for any reason, funnel a beer
11. Every time they say that “it’s destiny for the Saints to win” drink 1
12. If they show footage of Katrina survivors at the Superdome, take a shot of cheap liquor
13. If they call Saints fans the most passionate fans in football, drink 1
14. If they say that the Saints, Saints fans, or the City of New Orleans “deserve” a Superbowl victory, drink 1
15. Every time they say how good of a story the Saints are, drink 1
16. If Jeremy Shockey pretends to be hurt after dropping a pass, drink 2
17. If they mention the Saints beating the Falcons in 2006 in the first game after Katrina in the Superdome, drink 5 and remember that we are still a better football team with better fans.
18. Every time they compare hurricane Katrina to the Haiti earthquake, funnel a beer and yell “bullshit!”
19. Every time they mention Drew Brees as the Mardi Gras king, drink 1
20. Every time they show Archie Manning, drink 1, and mention how bad he sucked. If they show old footage of him on the Saints, drink 5. If they mention how tough of a decision it was for him as for whom to cheer for, drink 10.
21. Every time they show a saints fan yelling “Who dat!” Or a sign/shirt saying the same, drink 1.
22. If they show Chris Paul at the game, drink 1 and mention to someone how much better he is than Devon Williams.
23. If they show former Mayor Ray Nagin, drink 5 and then punch someone in the face

And I took this photo today, and proceeded to quickly devour the subject matter.
It tasted like victory.

 
Lemon and apple are by far my favorites, but how could I possibly turn down a Chocolate City Hu-Dat?